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Upgrade Your Referrals to Higher Quality

Whether you’ve asked for a referral or one has been volunteered, what do you usually do with it? Do you say, “Thanks, I’ll let you know what happens,” or do you linger a little longer to learn more about your new prospect?

I always advocate quality over quantity (though quantity is always important). Coming away from a meeting with 20 referrals at once doesn’t usually yield the kind of results you’d like:  The quality of the introduction is usually not very good.

Two Reasons to Upgrade Your Referrals

When you take the time to upgrade your referrals, you benefit in two ways. First, you will learn things about your prospect that will help you have a better conversation with them. You’ll demonstrate your relationship with their friends, and you’ll be able to build rapport more easily. Second, when your referral consists of little more than a name and phone number, it doesn’t feel like much more than a cold call. When you learn a lot about your new prospect, you’ll feel more comfortable (maybe even excited) about the call and, therefore, you’ll be more likely to contact the prospect right away.

Don’t Stop the Stream of Consciousness

There will be times when you ask for referrals and your referral source gets into what I call a “stream of consciousness.” He or she will rattle off a dozen names (or more). Sometimes, they’ll grab their cell phone, PDA or directory of association members, and feed you a ton of names.

When you catch a referral source in this flow, don’t stop it. Write the names down and encourage more.

However, after the flood is over, go back and identify three to five people you can learn more about in order to have a high-quality call with them. Tell your referral source you’ve learned through experience that you’ll be more successful in reaching, and eventually helping, these folks if you take a few at a time and learn as much as you can about them. Then tell your referral source you’ll call them in a week to learn more about the next “group.”

Some Questions to Ask

Here are a few general questions you want to ask your referral source in the upgrading process:

1. Why did you think of him first?

2. Has he expressed any concerns in this area?

3. Could you give me a sense of his personality?

4. How do you think he’ll react to his name coming up in conversation and me calling him?

5. What’s going on in his life right now that’s important to him?

6. What do you think is the best way to approach him so that he’ll be open to speaking and meeting with me? How can I pique his interest?

7. Could you tell me something you like or admire about him?

The Golden Key to Rapport

I need to emphasize the importance and power of question number seven. Every time you get a referral, ask your source what they like or admire about their friend, colleague or family member. Use this in the opening conversation with your prospect. You will be absolutely amazed by how easily this opens the door for you.

Of course, you may have other questions specific to the situation that you may want to ask as well. These are questions that may have helped you qualify them as appropriate to receive your call in the first place. Don’t ever hesitate to make sure it’s a good match. You don’t need to waste your time calling people who don’t fit your practice.

Time, Relationship and Courage

There are three major factors that will allow you to have these types of conversations with your referral sources:

1. Time – Manage your appointments well so the conversation isn’t rushed. Some producers like to schedule special meetings just for this purpose.

2. Relationship – The better the relationship you are able to establish with your clients, the more willing they will be to have this type of conversation with you.

3. Courage – If you’re not in the habit of getting upgraded referrals, you will have to tap into your courage the first few times. Soon, it will become second nature.




About Bill Cates

Bill Cates
Bill Cates is the President of Referral Coach International.  His trademarked Referral Advantage™ Program has been featured in such publications as Success Magazine, Entrepreneur Magazine, Selling Power and Research Magazine, and his own business success has been featured in Money Magazine. Bill is a regular contributing editor for many financial services publications. Visit his Web site at Bill Cates, author of “Get More Referrals Now!” and “Don’t Keep Me a Secret!” is offering you a free copy of his report “7 Deadly Referral Mistakes” as well as a subscription to his free referral newsletter with 30,000+ subscribers. (What do they know that you don’t?)  Go to  To contact Bill, send him an email at or call (301) 497-2200.

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